So it's 12:15 (I am the media director for PVM) and I still have about 125 photos to edit and to upload before  I go to sleep.....   OH JOY!

: )

Repost

Tuesday, July 31, 2007

Bring Your Discipline

Face to the ground
Sword and shield thrown to your feet

Teach me, my Lord, Your ways.
For night falls and duty calls
I make myself like the dust you brought me from
Lowered to the dirt you tread.

Beat me into submission.
Curse my flesh to the point of death so I may live
Salt me with Your fire and refine my soul.
Burn and scar me with Your righteousness
So that I will always remember
And never forget what I have been saved from.
I plead:
Teach me to cling
To You and what is Good
Discipline me
To be speak boldly against evil men and evil deeds.

I wish to be the tool of Your Love
And righteous judgments.
May I be kindled with Your Fire
And follow it to the death of evil.

When in the shadow of Death
May I not fear the shadow
But the Light that over towers the being creating the shadow!
May I stand strong in Your strength
And resist the tempter.
Discipline me, Lord.
Show me the meaning of true, unthinkable fear.
So that when darkness comes
Me and my brothers,
We shall be the ones to stand before the masses
Proclaiming Your name against the threat of death and torture.
For my life is not mine. 
Indeed, my life is Your's, my King.

I stand before You now
Waiting for Your orders.
Bring your fire.
Bring Your Discipline.

Amen.

It is falling your on face not out of righteousness but from stumbling so much.

It is seeing those who were once close to you turn a blind eye to you during your hardest times.

It is realizing that your actions will affect those who you love more so than your own self and praying to the Great Father that that will not happen.

It is seeing your loved ones who still love you reach out to you and you feel so helpless and useless for you cannot comprehend their pain.

It is when you fall in love and realizing my pain is her pain and vice versa.

It is when you punch the floor while praying because you continually the things you hate and all you get is sore knuckles and absolutely no edification at all....  but you feel better, right?

It's when at last you turn to Gods Word but you already know what it says!  The frustration just builds and you throw you bible against the wall and scream.

It's when you read job, and you want to agree with his friends. Simply curse God and die...

It is when you realize....   we are only dust.

It is when you:
-dry your tears
-bandage up your knuckles
-pick your bible and tape the pages that fell out
-try to wipe off the scuff marks on the wall
-tell whoever heard you scream you were trying to act like a metal singer
-tell the one you love that you love her (or him) despite any pain that may come
-you take your friends' hands who need you and pray with them despite the feeling of helplessness
-fall on your face out of humility and not obligation or laws of spiritual physics
-bow before your old friends who have their backs to you and admit your faults and wrong doings even if they still choose to not acknowledge you.

Life is Hard.  A Christian life is harder.  If anyone tells you differently, then I would recommend throwing a bible at them (literally or metaphorically is your choice).

I pray that whoever reads this finds it comforting, and that my sufferings as list above can perhaps be of some use to someone going through a hard time.  I like to think and say to others I am the typical goody goody Christian boy.  Well, as anyone probably knows, I am not.  I love you all.